Lyrics
People usually ask me
God Forbid’ they do say,
You’re quite the women guy,
what’s your secret? ‘
Well,
You too are swimmin’ in women
Afloat in seas of ovaries
But more importantly
Knowing whether behind those pretty eyes
You have diamond within the rough
Or colored lenses and a *whirling* rough striper known as diamond
Lets recreate the scene make think you’re at a dining dining table seat
Talking playfully to your waitress at your neighborhood spot to eat
Way under the apron,
maybeline,
odor of eggs and cheese,
bacon oil
she actually is a babe
and eight at least
you wish to push the bowl of quesadillas for the dining dining table and distribute them angel’s wings,
but you cannot state anything?
If you do not do well with women,
They offer prescribed drugs on television
May cause lack of appetite
Malnutrition,
Dizzy spells,
And different bells are ringing,
And that is where I are available in and provide em just a little additional assist to get em
(You can not get)
you notice self- self- confidence is paramount to any situation
(inside her pants)
We all have actually insecurities
So have you thought to create your self- confidence in the insecurities of others
(However you do not)
Hey, she is going to *bonk* somebody
(Give a damn)
why perhaps maybe not you.
The drunker you may be, the simpler it’s to obtain set, nevertheless the harder it would be to *boink*
You may need to visualize exactly exactly what it really is this months
Whoever you have been think of
The girl in the Pizza Hut
Midgets,
Nuns,
what miss that is ever little was.
And with just a little hard work
A small luck
If you occur to provide enough
Maybe you will get it well.
Now a *boink* is meant become fun
Instant satisfaction, a roller coaster (whee! )
But no body really wants to get stuck over and over,
Going home towards the roller coaster
Its hard to view your programs,
And do your homework
And if the trip you rode is over
It’ll price significantly more than a roll of quarters
(You can not get)
Pull out
I discover how warm and good it feels
(In her jeans)
But its getting crowded circular here
Please, pull out
(However you don’t)
If their not the main one you need to stay with
You can steer clear of the face,
(offer a damn)
But maybe not the abbreviation
Taking repayments from your own paycheck
You may do it, take out
Men have what I call a Columbus Complex’
Other individuals might have been here,
But we nevertheless wish to feel we discovered it
So never inform the amount that you done it with
Your summers in Columbia
whenever you had been young and done a lot of dumber sh*boing*
Rambunctious young ones!
Wait for the second date to cuff the wrists
Sponges, rubber gloves, and whips, oven mitts
Now a well trimmed individual area, that’ nice
But why’s she therefore prepared?
You do not suppose
She never ever understands
whenever she might show somebody?
Now think of 
that before going constant,
or even at your personal wedding.
(You can not get)
If she actually is your girlfriend
Leave her alone along with your friends
(In her pants)
Now, I do not expect no virgin,
But allow em attempt to screw her
If she is flirting, or *sound of cartoon feet*
(However you don’t)
It will not work man,
Get rid of her
And get a brand new girlfriend
Remember,
(Give a damn)
The guaranteed exchange rate,
At this party she actually is an eight,
during the club a seven,
At my apartment a 10.
Environment dictates.
The morning once,
She may slip up to a three
Cause several things are better just to lust for.
This conclude the introductory section associated with the God Forbid self-help collection
Hey, rest along with other races
Help out worldwide relations.
For further behavioral instructions, consult the nearest strip club, and/or alcohol shop
(whether or maybe not it’s not the one you want
just overlook it)